Three months from today, I am going to be saying ‘I do’ to the crazy man who asked me to marry him. I am currently feeling a whole plethora of emotions about my upcoming nuptials.
Joy and Excitement
Of course I am overjoyed to be marrying the man of my dreams. I’m excited about becoming his wife and spending forever with him. I can’t wait to put on my wedding dress…the only dress that has ever made me cry. I am so pumped to throw the best wedding reception ever, and celebrate with all my friends and family. But there’s all that…
Three months is not a long time in the grand scheme of things, and I’m feeling the pressure. When I first got engaged and people asked me how planning was going, I smiled brightly and responded with something cheerful. Now when I’m asked, I plaster a fake smile on my face, girt my teeth, and simply say, “It’s going.” I know it isn’t their fault, they are just being friendly, but lately I feel like every email, phone call, or text I receive has something to do with my wedding. And as many educators know, our job usually comes home with us. So, I’m trying really hard to balance work and wedding without my head exploding or my future husband asking for an early divorce. And it doesn’t help that I’m constantly filled with…
Fear and Anxiety
Will I have everything done in time? Will my wedding turn out as wonderful as I hope? Will my crazy family hold it together for the night? Will everyone have fun? Are just a few of the questions running marathons in my head.
I’m going to be a wife?! Me…the same girl who has, on occasion, picked up a pair of pants off the floor and smelled them to determine if they were clean enough for work because I was too lazy to do laundry. Now I am going to become part of this equal partnership where we take care of each other. I might actually have to start planning meals ahead of time.
Also, my family is now tripling. My mom always jokingly told me to marry an orphan, and as usual I did not listen to her. Instead I chose to marry a man who comes from a divorced family where both parents have remarried. Now I will have TWO mother-in-laws who will be constantly asking, So, when are we getting grandchildren?
I have been told by many that everything I am feeling is normal, but I still feel like all my emotions are going to eventually cause a massive emotional breakdown. In the next upcoming months, all I want to feel is…